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Monday, November 10, 2008

Criminal Sentence 122: Rewriting Practice

Can you cut this down, way down?

“The tailored jacket provided the woman with the ability to not only look good to her fullest potential but in addition also enabled her to show off her new figure.”

Post your shorter sentence in the comments section.

10 comments:

Jeanie W said...

“The tailored jacket provided the woman with the ability to not only look good to her fullest potential but in addition also enabled her to show off her new figure.”

The tailored jacket showed her new figure to full advantage.

LH said...

The tailored jacket enabled the woman to show off her new figure and look her best.

Premasru said...

The tailored jacket looked good on the woman and showed off her new figure.

Fennel Giraffe said...

The tailored jacket showed the woman's new figure at its best.

Mary Beth Ehrhardt said...

The tailored jacket showed the woman, along with her new figure, to the fullest potential.

The tailored jacket showed the woman and her new figure to the fullest potential.

joseahernandez said...

The tailored jacket allowed her to look her best while showing off her new figure.

Val said...

She was radiant in her jacket that accented her new figure.

The Sentence Sleuth said...

Now can you translate this lesson to your regular writing?

Premasru said...

“The woman’s new figure looked gorgeous in the tailored jacket.”

That's about as regular as it gets.

Cellan said...

The woman looked great in her tailored jacket, which allowed her to show off her new figure.