From a book I am reading:
"Tall and thin, with jet-black hair combed dramatically away from his face, she found herself momentarily distracted by his cheekbones and lips as she approached him."
This sentence doesn't work unless the he/she is one person, which is not possible. In other words, misplaced modifier. Who has jet-black hair? The man, not "she."
Who wants to rewrite it? Feel free to make it two sentences if you can't cram everything in there. Let's call the players Louise and Harry.
Ask Me a Question
If you have a writing, grammar, style or punctuation question, send an e-mail message to curiouscase at sign hotmail dot com.
Add Your Own Criminal Sentence!
If you find a particularly terrible sentence somewhere, post it for all to see (go here and put it in the Comments section).