The first sentence of an introduction to a book I finished:
"The writer would like to thank the many who leant their time, wisdom, and patience to the improvement of this book."
Obviously this sentence has not been improved enough! I find two ways to improve it:
1) Spell "lent" correctly!
2) Avoid the nominalization: "the improvement of." Why not just save words and say, "...patience to improve this book."
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Thursday, June 4, 2009
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