A double error in an article about the death of Michael Jackson:
"Upon arriving at the hospital at approximately 1:14 p.m., a team of doctors, including emergency phsyicians and cardiologists, attempted to resuscitate him for a period of one hour and they were unsuccessful."
Very sad, but let's focus on this sentence.
1) "Upon arriving at the hospital at approx. 1:14"--I don't think a team of doctors arrived; they were already there waiting to treat the patient. So this is a misplaced modifier. It would be better to say, "When Jackson arrived at the hospital..."
2) That's an interesting way to spell physicians: "phsyicians."
I heard a criminal sentence while listening to BBC Radio's coverage of Michael Jackson's death.
ReplyDeleteS
"Long known as the King of Pop, Michael Jackson's career began at the age of five."
So Michael Jackson's career had its own career entirely separate from the man himself? I don't think so.
When does a reference to time become approximate?
ReplyDeleteThe sentence says "approximately 1:14". That seems pretty definite to me. As a reporter, I would either write, "at 1:14 p.m." or something like "just after 1 p.m." It would depend on how important the time reference is to the subject the article is about.